Pitch Essay
By: Ella Onstott

I believe investing in our company is a wise decision. The product has good quality. We have incentives. We are raising money for our friend RC in the Philippines. I believe that it’s a wise decision if you invest in our company because of these three reasons. We need you to help us so we can sell Marshmallow shooters and raise money for RC at Marketday.
I believe investing in our company is a wise decision because our product has good quality. It has really good quality, the balloon is really hard to brake, honestly I have never broke a marshmallow shooter balloon even when I pulled as hard as I could! The pipe can’t break unless you use a saw to cut it in half. The tape is what holds the balloon to the pipe, so if there wasn’t skotch tape to hold the balloon down it would slip right off. The tape is very strong so it holds on really tight. And don’t forget it’s very very colorful.
It is a wise decision because our company has incentives. Our incentive is you write down on a piece of paper you name and 4A or something and put it in the container. Then at the end of Market Day we will pick six papers out of the box and six people will win a free Marshmallow Balloon Shooter. I think it will attract more people because nobody else is doing it so I think since no one else is doing it people will like it better. Also it’s something new.
I think it’s a wise decision because of RC. RC is a 9 year old boy who lives in the Philippines and would like to go to Grace Christian Community School. He is a christian and his family does not have enough money to send RC to a christian school. RC needs our help to raise money for him and send it to him. He has been very thankful that he has been able to go to GCCS for the past couple of years and he would really really like to go there more.
I believe that now that you’ve heard my three reasons you will invest in our company. We do have good quality. We have a fun incentive, and last but not least the most important reason is RC. Market day is really just a fun way of raising money for our friend RC, so that he can have a good christian education.

Reflection on the Pitch

I was so nervous when I woke up. I was jumpy and crazy and always talking, but when I was at school WHOO-EEE I was so nervous.
At first the shooters weren’t working when the VC were testing them, and I think my face turned as red as a tomato, but then they all got it and Jonathan “I’m in”, in a joking way. I was so nervous. After our keynote I asked if they had any questions or would like to invest in our company, but there was all silence and I felt like a tiny little fish in the middle of the sea with just blue waters for miles and miles, but then we got two offers one was our deal that was 35.00 with a 10% interest but then we got a better offer which was 35.00 with an 8% interest, so we went with that deal.

I think the story on RC went very well and also the Keynote that went with it. Also we had pretty good eye contact. We also made the VC laugh a lot.

I think we could’ve improved more on the skit (memorize the lines better) Introducing our selves could’ve been a little louder. We were a little hesitant with our choices with the offers.

If we did it again I think we could’ve practice more of the skit. Talked louder on the introducing ourselves. Not have so many props. Let others talk a little more not just me. Speed it up at the beginning. Slow down the story on RC. 🙂

For the Pitch next year for the kids, they just need to stay calm don’t freak out. What helped me was actually talking to Ms. Stacy (Mrs. Deters) and giving her a hug and just talking it through, and definitely just being yourself and answering the questions lound and clear and just have fun.