Click here to hear my story! –> Shark X Soul Surfer
Here’s my story in a PDF! –> Shark
Bam!
Bam! Nadia, Tom and Katy walked into church. They could hear the bell that church was starting.
They sang Bless The Lord O my Soul and many other songs. They had a service about when you get hurt or injured that God is with you. And no matter where you are God is always with you. They watched the little kids sing songs.
“They are really good” said Tom
“yeah no kidding,” Nadia replied
The waves
They went to the beach for the national surf contest. the announcer said “looks like Nadia has caught 6 waves so far and Katy caught her 4th. Alana has caught 8 waves and is in first place with 2 minutes left.
“Nadia and Katy are doing really good” said Tom.
“Yeah” said Nadias dad.
When the contest was over, Alana was the winner. Katy came in 2nd place and Nadia in 3rd. Although it was a competition, Nadia congratulated Alana but she just walked away as usual.
SHARK
At midnight Nadia went night surfing without her parents knowing. She went in the water. Tom dunked Katy in and Nadia dunked Tom in. They started to surf and Nadia fell in. Nadia falls deeper and deeper. Nadia feels something under her,SHARK! The shark cut open her left arm. This is the arm that she was not born with a hand on so there were a lot of things that were really hard. But she was glad that she was able to surf. She came up and Tom called the ambulance. Her parents saw the ambulance and they watched her go in. The doctor says, “she is in SHOCK.” When she woke up she asked her dad to get some water.
“Tom my arm hurts can you get the doctor.” Said Nadia
“sure” said Tom
“Your welcome.”
“She is really hurt” said her dad.
“I know” said Tom,
“Will she be ok?”
He sounded droopy.
“Lets pray together” said her dad.
After the prayer Tom said,
“I will go get the doctor”
“I am hungry”, said Nadia.
“You can’t eat you lost too much blood”
“But” said Nadia
“No buts.” said dad
When Nadia fell asleep the doctor came in.
He said,
“She is a living miracle.”
6 weeks later back on the waves
The doctor took out the stitches. It hurt but she did not cry. She was brave. They put tape on the cut She got home and said get on your swim suits we are going surfing.
The broken …
Nadia asked her dad to make a surfboard so when she dives she does not get stuck under the wave.
He told her yes so she practiced and practiced because she knew the surfing competition was coming up. But when she practiced her surfboard broke. Her dad made a knew one the competition is in 1 day. Tom went to go talk to Nadias dad. “Do you think she will make it” “i don’t no.”
the big day
They said they would give her a 5 minute head start. But Nadia said “i don’t need it.” 3 minutes later they heard “HONK.” The competition started Katy caches her first wave then Alana the best surfer then Nadia.
the show
Katy wins then Alana the best surfer then Nadia in 3rd. Katy has a new job at blue maren and there is a show coming up she wants Nadia to be in it. She wants Nadia to surf in it with the dolphins. We could tell that Alana was mad we could see she was pushed to go to china with her family. Nadia got to blue maren and practiced and then she said see you tomorrow for the big show.
The next day
“time for the show” 3 minutes later the the show started. Swiss and Jumper came out of the water. and Skipper and Sill jumped in on their backs and the rest swam on their backs. And Nadia surfed “what an amazing show” Tom said. after the show Nadia said i wish i could go back to the day i cut open my arm. But you never know what is going to happen but always know that God is always with you.
Anika, you have made so many great improvements on your story! I like that you added a lot of dialogue and that it was clear who was talking. Also, since you added so many details I could imagine the story in my mind. My favorite thing about your story is that you had the family rely on God and prayer throughout this tragedy. Your writing skills are improving with each piece of writing that I read from you. Keep up the hard work!
thankyou I apprysheat it
Anika,
Great job! You’ve made so many improvements since I last read this. I can tell you worked really hard to perfect your writing. I love that you added more dialogue and you did a good job developing your characters. The dialogue helps me understand what the characters are thinking and feeling. I also like your use of paragraphs and chapters. They help to break up your story a bit.
You added so many new details from that last time I read this. It was fun to read again because there were new things in each chapter.
One thing I was hoping for was a recording of you reading your story. I would have enjoyed hearing your expressions and voices for each character. I’ll keep checking back incase I missed it or you add it.
You did a great job and you made some really good changes. Keep it up!
-Gillian
thankyou!!